4 Must-Read Books on Feminism

 

Reading books on Feminism can help us understand feminism as a movement and how it had evolved through the centuries. Feminism is based on two premises:

(I)Gender difference is the foundation of structural inequality between men and women due to which women suffer social injustice.

(II)The inequality between the sexes is not because of biological necessity but it is produced by the cultural construction of gender differences.

Feminism demands equality between men and women. Here are the 4 must-read books that will help you understand feminism:

A Room of One’s Own by Virginia Woolf

It was published on 1929. Woolf was invited to give a lecture on the topic of Women and Fiction in a college for women. She reached the conclusion that "a woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction." Woolf observed that women colleges were under-funded and women were not given nutritious food. This is completely opposite to that of men’s colleges.

She wonders if Shakespeare had a talented sister, what the chances of her exploring her talent in patriarchal Elizabethan age were. She points out that a woman writer lives under constant pressure from patriarchy which often pushes women writers, (their novels & characters) to the point of insanity. In the end, Woolf tells women that they should work toward having five hundred pounds a year and a room of their own in which to write to produce works of genius.

The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir

Published in 1949, this essay talks about how women have been treated throughout history. Women are defined in relation to men; not the other way about. This results in inequality.

Men go out into the world to impose their will on it, whereas women are doomed to inwardness. He creates, acts, invents; she waits for him to save her. Beauvoir researches how women got this inferior status in society. Although she finds plenty of examples of female subordination in history, she cannot find any justification for it.

She says that women are not born “feminine” but shaped by a thousand external processes. She shows how, at each stage of her upbringing, a girl is conditioned into accepting passivity, dependence, repetition, and inwardness. In the end, she gives a solution on how women canget rid of ‘the second sex’ status in society.

We Should all be Feminists by  Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Published in 2014 and based on the famous Tedx talk of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, this book is a must read.

The personal, eloquently argued essay offers readers a unique definition of feminism for the 21st century, one that is rooted in inclusion and awareness. The author draws extensively from her own experiences and her deep understanding of the often masked realities of sexual politics.

She states: ‘I would like to ask that we begin to dream about and plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: we must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently…’

A very powerful and relevant book on feminism that is only 64 pages long.

Seeing Like a Feminist by Nivedita Menon

Published in 2012, Seeing Like a Feminist talks about a wide range of things. The author states that feminism is not about a single moment of final triumph over patriarchy but about the gradual transformation of society.

She talks about sexual harassment charges against international figures, challenges that caste politics poses to feminism, feminist dilemmas regarding surrogacy, the ban on the veil in France, the attempt to impose skirts on international women badminton players and several other topics. This book will help you understand how to look at the various issues of the world as a feminist and how it can make a difference.

Having a better understanding and knowledge of feminism can help us fight patriarchy better. So, do check out these amazing books and have an enriching read. 

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

This post is a part of Blogchatter Half Marathon.’ 

Why do so many Women refuse to call themselves Feminists?

 

While researching for this article, I learned that less than 1 out of 5 women like to call themselves ‘feminists' in the USA. I have often seen my closest friends and acquaintances shy away from calling themselves a feminist. When I ask them if they support the equality of men and women, they reply in the affirmative but they do not want to be labeled as feminists.

The Cambridge dictionary meaning of ‘feminism’ is the belief that women should be allowed the same rights, power, and opportunities as men and be treated in the same way.

Then why do so many women refuse to call themselves feminists? The nagging question in my mind made me find out all the probable reasons why most women support equality and yet stay away from the term ‘feminism’. Let’s take a look at all the reasons:

1.     Wrong or Inadequate knowledge

 

Some women believe that feminism is all about hating men. Wrong or inadequate knowledge is one of the reasons women refuse to call themselves feminists. They think that feminism is only restricted to women which is not the case. Feminism is not against men. It is against inequality and against patriarchy. Every woman should read about the movement called ‘feminism’ and educate herself before taking a decision.

 

2.     ‘Feminism’ is confused with ‘Feminazi’

 

Feminism is about the equality of men and women. Feminazi is about the superiority of women. A feminazi can be violent towards men. They blame men for everything and also blame women who disagree with their ideals. Feminism has nothing to do with Feminazi. Often women get confused and think ‘feminazi’ to be ‘feminism’ and therefore, they do not want to call themselves feminists.

 

3.     Internalizing patriarchy

 

Some women have internalized patriarchy so deeply that the concept of equality of men and women seems ridiculous to them. Simone de Beauvoir in her book ‘TheSecond Sex’ explained it beautifully why sometimes women trade freedom for security and are comfortable being the second sex.

 

4.     Competitiveness among women

 

The first rule of feminism is women should help and empower other women. Simone de Beauvoir has talked about the importance of gender loyalty in order to dismantle patriarchy. Some women simply cannot tolerate the success of other women. There is so much jealousy and competitiveness. They would rather celebrate the success of a man than someone who belongs to the same gender. 

 

5.     Feminist is often confused with ‘careerist’

 

Many women feel that in order to be feminists, they have to be career women. They think that stay-at-home mothers and homemakers cannot be feminists. This is not true at all. Feminism is the belief that men and women should have equal rights. Anyone supporting that belief is a feminist. It is not limited to working women.

 

6.     Stereotypes associated with ‘Feminist’

 

Sadly, feminists are labeled with a lot of stereotypes by the patriarchal society. Feminists are often thought of as spinsters, men-hating women, lesbians, women lacking femininity, women not wearing makeup and shaving legs and so much more. These stereotypes often repel many women from calling themselves, feminists.

So, these are the reasons why so many women refuse to call themselves feminists. I hope awareness of these reasons helps women change their minds and make them embrace the term ‘feminist’ without any shame or guilt. 

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

6 Quotes and Takeaways from The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir

 

'The Second Sex' by Simone de Beauvoir was published in 1949 after the second world war ended. It was the starting point of second-wave feminism.

The essay explores the way in which women have been treated throughout history and how gender conditioning governs the life of a woman. 

I recently studied this essay and felt that the points discussed in the essay are so much relevant even today.

Here are 6 quotes and takeaways from the revolutionary essay "The Second Sex":

1. “One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman.”

Simone de Beauvoir states that women are not born 'feminine' but are shaped that way by a thousand external processes. At each stage of her upbringing, a girl is conditioned into being docile, soft-spoken, dependent, and passive. Society tries to flatten the girl into an object so that she can accept the life of housework and childbearing without ever protesting. The girl will think that to be her very duty, the reason she is born.

2. ..her wings are cut and then she is blamed for not knowing how to fly.”

Simone de Beauvoir says that the situation of a woman is not a result of her character. If we find a woman who rarely has any material accomplishments, is labeled as lazy, mediocre, and complacent, it simply means that these are the consequences of the way she has been brainwashed by society. Her wings were cut during her growing up years and now she is criticized for not knowing how to fly. 

3. “Women's mutual understanding comes from the fact that they identify themselves with each other, but for the same reason each is against the others.”

Simone de Beauvoir beautifully said that women need to develop gender loyalty in order to dismantle patriarchy. One of the reasons why women's movements lose power is because women do not have great gender loyalties. The biggest proof is how society pits the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law against each other. Women need to recognize these patterns and develop gender loyalty because united we stand, divided we fall.

4. “That the child is the supreme aim of woman is a statement having precisely the value of an advertising slogan.”

Simone de Beauvoir stated that throughout history, maternity has been both worshipped and criticized - the mother both brings life and brings death. The woman is transformed into a symbol of 'life' and in that process, she is robbed of all individuality. It is expected that women are born to give birth, raise children and forget their own individuality to become great mothers. 

5. “And without a doubt it is more comfortable to endure blind bondage than to work for one's liberation; the dead, too, are better suited to the earth than the living.”

Simone de Beauvoir stated that at times, women support their own dependency and accept their second-class status without challenging it. Years of gender conditioning play a major role in it. Some women trade their freedom for security. Some women chose comfort over conquering. Only in work can a woman achieve autonomy and can support herself. But years of gender conditioning pushes many women to accept a life of bondage than fight for liberation. 

6. “Few tasks are more like the torture of Sisyphus than housework, with its endless repetition: the clean becomes soiled, the soiled is made clean, over and over, day after day.”

Simone de Beauvoir said that the difficulty of sacrificing security and comfort for some 'notion' of equality persuades many women to accept the unfulfilling roles in life. And she has beautifully described those roles by comparing them to the myth of Sisyphus. 

"The Second Sex" is a magnificent work in feminism that helps us understand how women have been treated in society for centuries, how women are conditioned, why women make different choices, and how not having great gender loyalty has prevented women from dismantling the patriarchy. 

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

Combat Body Shaming to Protect Your Mental Health

 

All of us have faced body shaming at least at some point in our lives. Body shaming is not just restricted to fat-shaming and thin shaming; it can be any derogatory comment about your body. If someone comments how frizzy your hair looks or the number of grey hair that you have, it is body shaming. If someone comments about your skin colour, teeth, eyes, nose, lips, or any other part of your body in a derogatory way, it is body shaming.

When confronted with body shaming, most of us feel tongue-tied while an avalanche of emotions somersault within us- anger, hurt, resentment, bitterness, sadness. The reason we often fail to reply to our body shamers is that we start doubting ourselves. 

When someone makes us feel miserable about our body, we are often paralyzed by self-doubt. As a result, we fail to stand up for ourselves at that moment. Later, we sulk thinking why we failed to give an apt reply.

There are two major problems of failing to stand up for ourselves when we are subjected to body shaming:

(i)                Our mental health gets compromised.

(ii)             We give the body shamers another chance to hurt us.

If we all speak up, if we stand up for ourselves every time someone passes a derogatory comment about our body and we promise ourselves not to indulge in body shaming, the venomous culture of body shaming would die a natural death.

Here are some tips to combat body-shaming:

1.     Understand that people who body shame others are victims of body shaming

 

First of all, it is important to understand who these body shamers are. They are chronic victims of body shaming and are always uncomfortable with their bodies. As they have such a hateful relationship with their body, they pull others down by body shaming.

 

Realizing this truth can help us forgive those people easily and not take their words to heart.

 

2.     Speak up

 

When someone passes a comment about your body weight or skin colour or hair, speak up. Let the person know it is not alright to comment about your body. Let the person know that you will not tolerate and give space for such a conversation.

 

If it is a friend, give a generous smile and tell him/her that you are happy and you love yourself just the way you are. If your friend wants to drag the discussion, ask whether they are happy with their body. If they are, they should not bother about how you look.

 

If it is an elder who is commenting about your body weight due to concern for you, smile and tell them it is your body type and that you are perfectly healthy. So he/she does not have to worry about you.

 

If it is a stranger who is commenting about your body, tell them to mind their own business.

 

I agree it is not easy to give a reply to the body shamer especially when it is a person who is close to you. But keeping quiet will worsen your mental health and allow that person to criticize you once again. 

3.     Develop a healthy and harmonious relationship with your body

 

If you want to combat body shaming, you have to develop a healthy relationship with your body. The foundation of the relationship needs to be so strong that a derogatory comment about your body cannot shake it.

 

Practice loving affirmations towards your body every day. Stand in front of the mirror and say these affirmations aloud:

 

“I love my body. I send love to each organ, bone, muscle, and part of my body.”

 

“My body is a miracle. I take care of my body by feeding it nutritious food. I enjoy caring for myself.”

 

“My body is perfect for me. I am beautiful and attractive just the way I am.”

 

“I am comfortable in my skin. I accept all of me.”

 

Invest your time and energy in taking good care of yourself. Make your relationship with your body so strong and harmonious that no one’s comment can make you doubt yourself. 

These are three tips to combat body shaming on a regular basis. Our mental health gets badly affected when we quietly tolerate body shaming and drown ourselves in self-doubts. We try a wide range of things to look perfect so that our body shamers speak well about us. But guess what? No matter how we look, our body shamers will always have something wrong to tell if we give them that space.

So, let’s pledge today to

-Stand up for ourselves when someone makes a derogatory statement about our body

-Develop a healthy, loving, and harmonious relationship with our body

-Never indulge in body shaming

We are all in this together!

 

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

5 Ways to Journal for Good Mental Health

 

I started journaling in 2014 after listening to Robin Sharma’s mastery sessions. Journaling has helped me in understanding myself, having better clarity of my goals, releasing pent-up anger, expressing my gratitude, and be more organized.

Over the years, I have become a calmer and more emotionally stable person due to journaling. Earlier, I used to have massive mood swings which I comprehended as normal. I never tried to understand why my mood changed. I used to distract myself with Netflix or Social Media until my mood changed for the better.

I write in my journal every Sunday evening. I review the bygone week and plan the next week. I have downloaded a journal App on my phone called ‘Presently’ where I write down the things that I am grateful for, every single day. Apart from these rituals, I journal when I feel upset, confused, and chaotic. From my own experience, I can say that Journaling is the key to good mental health.

In this article, I will discuss 5 ways to journal to feel happy, calm, and emotionally stable.

1.List of Things That You are Grateful For

Making a list of things that you are grateful for can make you feel so much good about your life. As I have mentioned, I have this ritual of writing down 10 things I am grateful for.

No matter how stressful your day is, there is always something to be grateful for. And when we feel grateful for all the things that we have, we attract better things in our life.  

2.Letter Writing

If you are angry or upset with someone, write a letter to them in your journal. Write everything that you want to tell them in person. Once you have written down all those feelings, you will start feeling better. Then, you can talk to that person depending on the equation that you share or you can just wish them well and move on.

Often, our suppressed feelings give way to pain and depression. So, if anyone’s behavior has hurt you, you can write a letter to them in your journal.

3.Express your feelings about a situation

If you find yourself in a troubling situation where you are confused or upset, write down in your journal about your feelings about that particular situation. As you will pour your thoughts on paper, things will get clearer. The Divine Intelligence will guide you in understanding the best that you can do in your situation.

4.Get to Know Yourself

When you spend more time with yourself, you will know yourself better. Journaling is a great way to know about your likes, dislikes, strengths, weakness, fears, and anxieties. You can use these simple prompts to know yourself better:

I feel the best when…..

I feel upset and angry when….

My strengths….

My weaknesses….

I worry about….

3 dreams that I want to fulfill….

5. Review the last week

I already told about my Sunday evening ritual when I contemplate the bygone week. Doing this exercise helps me understand how I can be a better and more organized person.

We keep learning various things every week but because we don’t document them, we forget those precious insights. So, it is a great idea to review the last week on your journal and make plans for the week ahead.

Now that you know about 5 different ways to journal, I would like to share a few tips that will make your journaling journey a comfortable one:

(i)Let your journal be a judgment-free zone. Do not judge yourself by what you have written.

(ii)Do not worry about grammar and spelling. Write freely without worrying about a spelling mistake or a typo.

(iii)Set a timer of fifteen minutes. Keep writing till the timer buzzes.

(iv)Write every day at least for five minutes to gain maximum benefit.

Embark on this beautiful and peaceful journey of journaling today. You will not only have better mental health but you will discover yourself as your best friend.

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

10 Affirmations to Practice When You Feel Lost and Directionless

 

Often in our fast-paced lives, we experience mental fatigue and start feeling directionless. In the race of achieving and accomplishing, a setback in our professional or personal life can throw us off-track and leave us doubting our own abilities. 

Mental exhaustion can result in anxiety, stress eating, mental block, irritability, insomnia, and lack of motivation. We have all encountered this situation when we have felt lost and directionless. If left unattended for weeks and months, mental exhaustion can soon push us towards the abyss of depression.

I have experienced the power of affirmation during these times when I don't have a single clue on what can motivate me and make me feel better. 

Affirmations can re-program our subconscious mind and help us create the life that we want. Affirmations encourage us to overcome self-doubts and believe positive things about ourselves and the world we live in. 

Here are 10 affirmations to practice when you feel lost and directionless: 

1. "I flow with life easily and effortlessly. Life supports me at all times." 

💛

2. "The Divine Intelligence/Universe is always guiding me. I cannot be lost or lonely or abandoned ever."

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3. "The wisdom I seek is within me. Everything that I want to know gets revealed to me at the right time."

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4. "I live in the 'Now' and that is my Superpower." 

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5. "All is well. I have everything I need now."

💛 

6. "I  release the need to be perfect. I love and approve of myself exactly as I am."

💛 

7. "My best relationship is the one with me. I value myself."

💛 

8. "I choose thoughts that nourish me, uplift me, and give me peace. I love my own thoughts."

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9. "There is help wherever I turn. I am safe."

💛 

10. "I focus my mind on the beautiful things in life and feel grateful for them." 

It is our responsibility to take care of our mental health whenever we encounter any warning signs. Affirmations are a great way to change our negative thinking patterns, thus boosting our mental health. 

Repeat each affirmation three to five times slowly and clearly. It may feel odd in the beginning but soon you will love the positive vibrations emanating from the words and filling you up. Let the words feel as natural to you as your breath. Remember, as you say those words aloud, you are bringing all the good things in your life through the Law of Attraction. 

If you feel mentally exhausted, do not continue working on autopilot. Take a break, have your favorite beverage, practice affirmations, journal about the things you are grateful for, and read a positive self-help book. You can check out Louisa Hay's "Meditations to heal your life". That's the book I am reading these days. 

Let us all prioritize our mental health this year!

Stay blessed. Stay safe.

 "This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

5 Yoga Asanas for Boosting Your Immunity

Yoga is a miracle when it comes to health and wellness. As it works on the mind, body, and spirit, you are rewarded with holistic overall wellness. Your body gets fitter and stronger. Your immunity gets strengthened, and you are able to have a better grip on stress and anxiety. 

When stress hormones like cortisol accumulate in the body for long periods of time, it results in hormonal imbalance and the immunity of the body decreases. It also increases inflammation. Yoga helps in balancing all the 7 chakras of our body, thereby resulting in overall health and vitality. 

In today's post, we are going to discuss 5 yoga asanas that can help in boosting your immunity to a large extent when practiced at least five days a week. Breathe deeply while you hold the asana. Focus all your concentration on the inhalation and exhalation. Try holding each asana for 10 seconds and then gradually increase it to a minute. 

1. Setu Bandhasana (The Bridge Pose)

Setu Bandhasana or the Bridge pose instantly relaxes the entire body. If you are feeling stressed and anxious, lie down on your yoga mat and try the asana. 

Effect on Immunity: It improves blood circulation in the body and opens the heart thereby healing the respiratory system. It also facilitates digestion. You will experience an increase in energy after doing this asana a few times. 

Chakra: This asana chiefly works on the Vishuddha or the Throat Chakra. It helps in getting relief from a sore throat, thyroid disorders, and anxiety. When the throat chakra is activated, you can express your thoughts and feelings easily. 

You can also try variations of the asana to increase your balance and strength. 

2. Bhujangasana (The Cobra Pose)

Another wonderful Yoga Asana for strengthening your immunity is the Bhujangasana or the Cobra pose. It is great for people who suffer from asthma as it opens up the heart and the lungs. 

Effect on Immunity: It improves blood circulation in the body. It is also therapeutic for people who face stomach disorders as the asana facilitates digestion. It improves the function of various organs such as the liver, pancreas, gallbladder, and kidney.

Chakra: Bhujangasana balances all the seven chakras of the body. It increases energy in the body and elevates your mood. 

3. Dhanurasana (The Bow Pose)

Dhanurasana or The Bow Pose is another wonderful asana that improves your appetite and digestion. 

Effect on Immunity: Practicing this asana regularly will keep gastrointestinal disorders at bay. It strengthens the muscles of the back, thereby relieving back pain. The yoga asana is beneficial for curing respiratory and menstrual disorders. It is also great for diabetes patients. 

Chakra: This asana activates the Manipura chakra or solar plexus of the body which is the center of vitality. 

4. Ustrasana (Camel Pose)

Ustrasana or The Camel Pose is one of the best yoga asanas for boosting your immunity. 

Effect on Immunity: It is a great heart opener that prevents the body from any respiratory diseases. If you are suffering from the common cold, practicing this asana can heal your body. It also improves digestion by toning the abdominal region. It makes the spine flexible. The yoga asana strengthens the shoulder, arms and back muscles. 

Chakra: This asana activates the Anahata or Heart Chakra. When this chakra is activated, we feel balanced and calm. We are able to radiate unconditional love and joy.

You can also practice interesting variations of this asana to spice up your yoga session. 

5. Matsyasana (The Fish Pose)

Matsyasana or The Fish Pose is often called "destroyer of diseases." 

Effect on Immunity: It is one of the best yoga asanas for boosting immunity as it tones the pituitary, parathyroid and pineal glands. It heals backache and menstrual pain. It is a powerful yoga asana that can help you get relief from respiratory ailments such as sore throat, cold, fever. 

Chakra: This asana activates the Sahasrara or Crown chakra where wisdom lies. When this chakra is activated, you are able to make the right decisions without any fear. The asana also opens the Visuddha or Throat chakra and Anahata or Heart Chakra. 

These are some yoga asanas which when practiced regularly can boost your immunity and give you joyous health. As they activate the chakras, you experience love, joy, and bliss. 

Focus on your breath when you practice the asanas. All these asanas are great at curing stress, anxiety, and fatigue. 

"Yoga is a light, which once lit, will never dim. The better your practice, the brighter the flame." - B.K.S.Iyengar

This post is a part of Blogging with a Purpose series in association with Blogchatter. My theme for this year is Physical, Mental, and Emotional Wellness. 

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