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Showing posts with label Article. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Article. Show all posts

Friday, 25 June 2021

4 Must-Read Books on Feminism

 


Reading books on Feminism can help us understand feminism as a movement and how it had evolved through the centuries. Feminism is based on two premises:

(I)Gender difference is the foundation of structural inequality between men and women due to which women suffer social injustice.

(II)The inequality between the sexes is not because of biological necessity but it is produced by the cultural construction of gender differences.

Feminism demands equality between men and women. Here are the 4 must-read books that will help you understand feminism:

A Room of One’s Own by Virginia Woolf

It was published on 1929. Woolf was invited to give a lecture on the topic of Women and Fiction in a college for women. She reached the conclusion that "a woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction." Woolf observed that women colleges were under-funded and women were not given nutritious food. This is completely opposite to that of men’s colleges.

She wonders if Shakespeare had a talented sister, what the chances of her exploring her talent in patriarchal Elizabethan age were. She points out that a woman writer lives under constant pressure from patriarchy which often pushes women writers, (their novels & characters) to the point of insanity. In the end, Woolf tells women that they should work toward having five hundred pounds a year and a room of their own in which to write to produce works of genius.

The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir

Published in 1949, this essay talks about how women have been treated throughout history. Women are defined in relation to men; not the other way about. This results in inequality.

Men go out into the world to impose their will on it, whereas women are doomed to inwardness. He creates, acts, invents; she waits for him to save her. Beauvoir researches how women got this inferior status in society. Although she finds plenty of examples of female subordination in history, she cannot find any justification for it.

She says that women are not born “feminine” but shaped by a thousand external processes. She shows how, at each stage of her upbringing, a girl is conditioned into accepting passivity, dependence, repetition, and inwardness. In the end, she gives a solution on how women canget rid of ‘the second sex’ status in society.

We Should all be Feminists by  Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Published in 2014 and based on the famous Tedx talk of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, this book is a must read.

The personal, eloquently argued essay offers readers a unique definition of feminism for the 21st century, one that is rooted in inclusion and awareness. The author draws extensively from her own experiences and her deep understanding of the often masked realities of sexual politics.

She states: ‘I would like to ask that we begin to dream about and plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: we must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently…’

A very powerful and relevant book on feminism that is only 64 pages long.

Seeing Like a Feminist by Nivedita Menon

Published in 2012, Seeing Like a Feminist talks about a wide range of things. The author states that feminism is not about a single moment of final triumph over patriarchy but about the gradual transformation of society.

She talks about sexual harassment charges against international figures, challenges that caste politics poses to feminism, feminist dilemmas regarding surrogacy, the ban on the veil in France, the attempt to impose skirts on international women badminton players and several other topics. This book will help you understand how to look at the various issues of the world as a feminist and how it can make a difference.



Having a better understanding and knowledge of feminism can help us fight patriarchy better. So, do check out these amazing books and have an enriching read. 


"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

This post is a part of Blogchatter Half Marathon.’ 





Sunday, 21 March 2021

Combat Body Shaming to Protect Your Mental Health

 


All of us have faced body shaming at least at some point in our lives. Body shaming is not just restricted to fat-shaming and thin shaming; it can be any derogatory comment about your body. If someone comments how frizzy your hair looks or the number of grey hair that you have, it is body shaming. If someone comments about your skin colour, teeth, eyes, nose, lips, or any other part of your body in a derogatory way, it is body shaming.

When confronted with body shaming, most of us feel tongue-tied while an avalanche of emotions somersault within us- anger, hurt, resentment, bitterness, sadness. The reason we often fail to reply to our body shamers is that we start doubting ourselves. 

When someone makes us feel miserable about our body, we are often paralyzed by self-doubt. As a result, we fail to stand up for ourselves at that moment. Later, we sulk thinking why we failed to give an apt reply.

There are two major problems of failing to stand up for ourselves when we are subjected to body shaming:

(i)                Our mental health gets compromised.

(ii)             We give the body shamers another chance to hurt us.

If we all speak up, if we stand up for ourselves every time someone passes a derogatory comment about our body and we promise ourselves not to indulge in body shaming, the venomous culture of body shaming would die a natural death.

Here are some tips to combat body-shaming:

1.     Understand that people who body shame others are victims of body shaming

 

First of all, it is important to understand who these body shamers are. They are chronic victims of body shaming and are always uncomfortable with their bodies. As they have such a hateful relationship with their body, they pull others down by body shaming.

 

Realizing this truth can help us forgive those people easily and not take their words to heart.

 

2.     Speak up

 

When someone passes a comment about your body weight or skin colour or hair, speak up. Let the person know it is not alright to comment about your body. Let the person know that you will not tolerate and give space for such a conversation.

 

If it is a friend, give a generous smile and tell him/her that you are happy and you love yourself just the way you are. If your friend wants to drag the discussion, ask whether they are happy with their body. If they are, they should not bother about how you look.

 

If it is an elder who is commenting about your body weight due to concern for you, smile and tell them it is your body type and that you are perfectly healthy. So he/she does not have to worry about you.

 

If it is a stranger who is commenting about your body, tell them to mind their own business.

 

I agree it is not easy to give a reply to the body shamer especially when it is a person who is close to you. But keeping quiet will worsen your mental health and allow that person to criticize you once again. 


3.     Develop a healthy and harmonious relationship with your body

 

If you want to combat body shaming, you have to develop a healthy relationship with your body. The foundation of the relationship needs to be so strong that a derogatory comment about your body cannot shake it.

 

Practice loving affirmations towards your body every day. Stand in front of the mirror and say these affirmations aloud:

 

“I love my body. I send love to each organ, bone, muscle, and part of my body.”

 

“My body is a miracle. I take care of my body by feeding it nutritious food. I enjoy caring for myself.”

 

“My body is perfect for me. I am beautiful and attractive just the way I am.”

 

“I am comfortable in my skin. I accept all of me.”

 

Invest your time and energy in taking good care of yourself. Make your relationship with your body so strong and harmonious that no one’s comment can make you doubt yourself. 




These are three tips to combat body shaming on a regular basis. Our mental health gets badly affected when we quietly tolerate body shaming and drown ourselves in self-doubts. We try a wide range of things to look perfect so that our body shamers speak well about us. But guess what? No matter how we look, our body shamers will always have something wrong to tell if we give them that space.

So, let’s pledge today to

-Stand up for ourselves when someone makes a derogatory statement about our body

-Develop a healthy, loving, and harmonious relationship with our body

-Never indulge in body shaming

We are all in this together!

 


Sunday, 28 February 2021

5 Ways to Journal for Good Mental Health

 


I started journaling in 2014 after listening to Robin Sharma’s mastery sessions. Journaling has helped me in understanding myself, having better clarity of my goals, releasing pent-up anger, expressing my gratitude, and be more organized.

Over the years, I have become a calmer and more emotionally stable person due to journaling. Earlier, I used to have massive mood swings which I comprehended as normal. I never tried to understand why my mood changed. I used to distract myself with Netflix or Social Media until my mood changed for the better.

I write in my journal every Sunday evening. I review the bygone week and plan the next week. I have downloaded a journal App on my phone called ‘Presently’ where I write down the things that I am grateful for, every single day. Apart from these rituals, I journal when I feel upset, confused, and chaotic. From my own experience, I can say that Journaling is the key to good mental health.

In this article, I will discuss 5 ways to journal to feel happy, calm, and emotionally stable.

1.List of Things That You are Grateful For

Making a list of things that you are grateful for can make you feel so much good about your life. As I have mentioned, I have this ritual of writing down 10 things I am grateful for.

No matter how stressful your day is, there is always something to be grateful for. And when we feel grateful for all the things that we have, we attract better things in our life.  

2.Letter Writing

If you are angry or upset with someone, write a letter to them in your journal. Write everything that you want to tell them in person. Once you have written down all those feelings, you will start feeling better. Then, you can talk to that person depending on the equation that you share or you can just wish them well and move on.

Often, our suppressed feelings give way to pain and depression. So, if anyone’s behavior has hurt you, you can write a letter to them in your journal.

3.Express your feelings about a situation

If you find yourself in a troubling situation where you are confused or upset, write down in your journal about your feelings about that particular situation. As you will pour your thoughts on paper, things will get clearer. The Divine Intelligence will guide you in understanding the best that you can do in your situation.

4.Get to Know Yourself

When you spend more time with yourself, you will know yourself better. Journaling is a great way to know about your likes, dislikes, strengths, weakness, fears, and anxieties. You can use these simple prompts to know yourself better:

I feel the best when…..

I feel upset and angry when….

My strengths….

My weaknesses….

I worry about….

3 dreams that I want to fulfill….

5. Review the last week

I already told about my Sunday evening ritual when I contemplate the bygone week. Doing this exercise helps me understand how I can be a better and more organized person.

We keep learning various things every week but because we don’t document them, we forget those precious insights. So, it is a great idea to review the last week on your journal and make plans for the week ahead.

Now that you know about 5 different ways to journal, I would like to share a few tips that will make your journaling journey a comfortable one:

(i)Let your journal be a judgment-free zone. Do not judge yourself by what you have written.

(ii)Do not worry about grammar and spelling. Write freely without worrying about a spelling mistake or a typo.

(iii)Set a timer of fifteen minutes. Keep writing till the timer buzzes.

(iv)Write every day at least for five minutes to gain maximum benefit.

Embark on this beautiful and peaceful journey of journaling today. You will not only have better mental health but you will discover yourself as your best friend.

"This post is part of Blogchatter's CauseAChatter"

Sunday, 27 December 2020

Things That I am Grateful for, in 2020

 


"Life surprises us the most
When we refuse to quit
At the face of thunder and hurricane,
Knowing well that every storm
Will eventually run out of rain."

2020 changed our perspective towards life. It made us pause, reflect, and introspect. Apart from Covid-19, we people in Kolkata had to fight the hurricane called Amphan in the month of May which was devastating. Negativity, chaos, restlessness, and fear of the uncertain were looming all around us. And yet, 2020 is the year that helped me discover my inner power. 

In this post, I am going to share 7 things that I am grateful for, in 2020 :

1. Yoga and Meditation


I started doing Yoga regularly in 2019 but this year helped me go deeper into it. As I was determined to keep myself physically and mentally fit this year, I made yoga asanas, pranayamas, and meditation an integral part of my daily life.

I started practicing Vinyasa Yoga (flow of yoga asanas) and embarked on my journey towards Kriya Yoga after reading 'Autobiography of a Yogi'.


I completed the first part of the 4-part Kriya Home Study Course by Ananda Institution founded by Swami Kriyananda. Spirituality helped me keep calm amid the chaos. It taught me to stay stable even when situations and people were not according to my way. 

2. Life-Changing Books  

There was no electricity in our house for about 4 days after the Amphan thunderstorm. It was a very difficult time in our lives. That was when some divine force inspired me to pick the book 'Autobiography of a Yogi' from my bookshelf. 

It won't be an exaggeration if I say that it is the best book I have ever read in my life. It changed me as a person and empowered me with its plethora of spiritual teachings. I know that I will go back to this book again and again throughout my life. 

Other life-changing books that I read in 2020 for which I am grateful for, are Tuesdays with Morrie, Hygge, Archer by Paulo Coelho, Vitamin H series by Abhishek Thakkar, Follow Your Rainbow by Rashmi Bansal, Adiyogi by Sadhguru. 

3. Baking


I learned baking this year! I always wanted to bake cakes but due to my hectic schedule, I always ordered from a confectionery shop. Things were different this year due to the lockdown. 

I was not ready to spend my birthday without a birthday cake. So I decided to try baking. On my birthday, I baked a chocolate cake and decorated it with wafers, gems, and nutties. It was so delicious that I fell in love with the art of baking. I made mango cake, coffee cake, and many more chocolate cakes throughout the year. 

I am so grateful that this year made me fall in love with baking. The aroma of a freshly baked cake is magical!

4. Family Time and Staying in Touch with loved ones


Another thing that I am grateful for in 2020 is the amazing bonding time that Papa and I got. Papa and I have always been busy with our work commitments. But 2020 gave us ample time to be each other's best friends. 

We cooked together, tried various recipes, baked, divided household chores, watched web series, listened to audio stories together, celebrated festivals and special occasions. 

I am also grateful that I could stay in touch with my loved ones through video calls and audio calls. Although I couldn't meet them, but we could be with each other in the highs and lows of this turbulent year. 

5. A great year for writing


2020 has been a very fulfilling year for my writing journey. I was busy with clearing UGC NET and with other content developing projects in 2019 which halted my writing. I am so grateful that I could focus on my writing project "Mythological Monologues" when the lockdown started. 

The A to Z challenge helped me complete my 6th book "Mythological Monologues" and publish it later in both Kindle and Paperback edition

In the month of November, I participated in NaNoWriMo and completed writing my next novel "Falling Like the Stars" (of 50,000 words) in a month. 

I also wrote a thriller short story "Larceny of Identity" for the book "Macabre Tales" of which I am a guest author. I won the Romantic Rendezvous contest of Writers Melon in which my romantic short story "One day, it will rain" got the first prize and was selected for their upcoming anthology. My audio story "Rose, the Painter's Beloved" (a paranormal story) was selected in the audiobook "Unearthly Lores". You can listen to the story here

Overall, it was a fulfilling year for writing where I worked on my poetry book, novel, and short stories of 3 genres - romance, thriller, and horror. 

6. Learning Literature with Purba


Students were unable to attend classes in this pandemic. I feel so grateful that I could teach English Literature to college students and NET aspirants through my YouTube Channel and Podcast of Learning Literature with Purba. 

My sole focus was to create enriching videos of English Literature that could help plenty of students and make bite-sized podcast episodes that will make Literature a lot of fun. Today, my channel has more than 13.6K subscribers and my podcast is being listened by people of more than 18 countries. 

7. Happiness lies within

I learned this year that my happiness lies within me, not on something outside me. I am the Creator of my Destiny. I create my thoughts, feelings, words, and deeds which contribute to my happiness. 

This year, after the lockdown, I could not meet any of my friends. The first time I went out of my house was in November after more than 8 months of staying at the house. I hardly ordered food from restaurants and went on outings. Despite that, I was happy, stable, and peaceful. 

All I had to do was think and create positive thoughts consciously, take care of my mental and physical health, and wake up with the intention of being good and kind to everyone who comes across me. When we are calm, we can find joy in every situation. This year empowered me and helped me connect with my inner paradise. 

Well, these are a few things that I am extremely grateful for, in 2020. This year brought me closer to myself, made me calmer, wiser, and more compassionate. 

The fact that we have reached the end of 2020 proves that we have survived the most challenging year with flying colours. I am sure all of us have learned something from this year that we will carry forward in 2021. 

May we be compassionate towards everyone - ourselves, fellow humans, animals, and Mother Nature. Wishing everyone a wonderful 2021! 

"When humans learn to bloom together
At their own pace and style
Like the rose, lily, and the sunflower~
No competition
No insecurities
No fear
No envy;
The Earth will turn into an
Evergreen garden of paradise." 


 ‘This blog post is a part of the Welcome 2021 Blog Hop hosted by Swarnali Nath.’










Friday, 6 March 2020

8 Things my Grandmother taught me that made me #TheWomanThatIAm



After my mother passed away when I was twelve, my maternal grandmother became the mother figure in my life. Despite battling with breast cancer and losing her only daughter, she made a vow to live for me, to raise me as a strong, independent woman and only leave the world when she has done her job successfully. It was because of her tremendous will power that she survived several operations and became a breast cancer survivor.

From a grandmother to a mother to a best friend and guide, she played various roles in my life. I would like to mention 8 things that my grandmother taught me which made me the woman that I am.

1.Never give the driver's seat of your life to anyone.


During my late teens and early twenties, I often relied on others for making important decisions. My grandmother taught me to control the steering and drive my own life. She taught me to make my own decisions and never give that power to anyone else, no matter how close they are to me or how difficult it is for me to make the decision. She taught me to take full ownership of my life and responsibility for my actions so that I never play the blame game or behave like a victim. 



2.Faith will take you anywhere you want to go.

Today, I am a huge believer in the law of attraction. It is from my grandmother that I learned faith can make anything possible whereas doubts can ruin everything.

3.Nothing is stronger than your willpower.

As I already mentioned, it was my grandmother’s willpower that helped her survive many operations.  When I was giving my class 12 board exams, I was suffering from a chronic migraine that hardly allowed me to study. I thought I would fail in my exams. It was during that time she told me that nothing is stronger than willpower. And true to her words, I managed my studies by sheer willpower and passed the exams with flying colors. 




4.If you want to know whether a person or place is good for you, observe how you are feeling within when you meet that person or visit that place. Your intuition will never lie.

During my early twenties, I made too many mistakes in recognizing people. As a result, many people took advantage of my goodness and betrayed my trust. That is when my grandmother gave me this beautiful pearl of advice, which has helped me over the years to understand people better.

5.People who love us unconditionally never leave us. They live within us, providing courage and strength during the hours we need it.

Whenever I missed my mother, my grandmother comforted me with these words until I realized how true it is. 


6. Life is an echo. What we give, return to us manifold. Bless everyone and blessings will return to you manifold. Talking negatively about anyone will make that person talk more negatively about you, thereby making the relationship bitter.

Whenever I felt someone wronged me and talked negatively about them, this is what my grandmother told me. And after many years of ignoring it, today I live by this advice and try not to think/talk negatively about anyone. 


7.Tears are not a sign of weakness. The person who can cry without inhibitions can laugh freely.

After I lost my mother, I used to try to maintain a tough exterior. I used to feel ashamed of crying. When I used to see my grandmother in tears, holding my mother’s photograph, I used to feel uncomfortable. That was when my grandmother taught me to embrace tears with the same ease that I embrace laughter. And that has helped me laugh and live life to the fullest.


8.Honesty is the best prayer.

My grandmother was a very spiritual person. I had never seen her telling a lie. When I asked her how she manages to do it, she told me that the best way to be close to God, is to be honest. Satyam Shivam Sundaram! Truth is God. Over the years, as I became more spiritually inclined, these words of my grandmother got ingrained in my mind and helped me become a better person.

My grandmother left the world in 2017, when I was twenty six, but her life continues to inspire me. Just like Mahatma Gandhi said, “My life is my message”, my grandmother’s life was her message to all her loved ones. She was my grandmother, mother, friend, guide, and soulmate combined into one. She lives within me and her love sheaths me from every danger.

Blankets of snow
Fail to smother the warmth
Of my pashmina shawl
That my grandmother
Weaved for me
A decade back.
How adeptly
Her labor of love
Defeats the frosty thorns
From stinging me today.
Love alone triumphs!





“This post is a part of ‘The Woman That I Am’ Blog Hop #TheWomanThatIAm organized by Rashi Roy and Manas Mukul #RRxMM. The Event is sponsored by Kraffitti.”

Tuesday, 22 May 2018

Love Actually~ A moment frozen in time


Photographs are no doubt a person's most prized treasure as they capture the smile, the twinkle of the eye and the glow of the face perfectly. After the passage of many years, when we come across one such photograph, we can relive that moment once again in the screen of our mind. And it makes us feel that we are alive. 

Material possessions are nothing compared to the moments where we have truly lived...moments where our souls were dancing with joy...moments when we felt an abundance of love. 

The selfie culture has made it easier to capture precious moments without depending on another person to capture the moment. There is a story behind each photograph and today, I am going to share the story behind one of my favorite selfies.


This is the selfie of me and my grandmother whom I fondly called Dimma. It was taken in 2013 at Digha, a sea beach near Kolkata. My grandmother and I shared a very deep soul connection where we could read each other's eyes and understand the unspoken words. We were also great friends who pulled each other's legs and laughed a lot together. There were no secrets between me and her. That's how close we were.

She was very fond of sea beaches and so, every year, we used to go to Digha or Mandarmani, the beaches near Kolkata. She used to close her eyes as the sea breeze caressed her face. She used to look at the waves with a child-like delight and discuss philosophies of life with me. 

During this particular vacation, I bought a white hat and was clicking plenty of pictures. 

"Dimma! Click a nice picture of me with this hat. Isn't it looking pretty on me?" I asked her as I was posing in front of the mirror.

"Yes, you look pretty in everything. You know I always wanted to wear a white hat and a pink sweater. I wanted to see how I look in it. A silly fantasy!" My grandmother chuckled. 

"No, not at all silly. You will look so beautiful. You wear my pink cardigan and this white hat tomorrow when we go to the beach." I said with a lot of enthusiasm.

"Jhum, are you crazy? What will people think? An old woman of 70 roaming around in a pink sweater and a hat. No, my dear, I can wear it now, in front of you. But not in front of everyone." My grandmother said.

"No. You have to do this for me. Else I will be upset. You say you love me the most. Can't you do this for me, Dimma?" I tried to emotionally blackmail her so that she agrees.

Finally, my grandmother nodded her head and smiled at me. 

So, the next day, I wore my violet floral dress and a hairband. Due to my emotional blackmailing, my grandmother wore my pink cardigan over her saree and the white hat. She looked so beautiful that I couldn't stop praising her. A young couple also complimented my grandmother. She was delighted. 

I took out my phone and captured that moment. The selfie was awesome. My grandmother stole all the limelight from me. When I showed it to my grandmother, she was so excited. She couldn't believe that she was looking so good and different. She kissed my cheek and told me that I made her so happy. Whenever we showed this selfie to any relative or friend, everyone complimented only my grandmother and the ways her eyes twinkled, appeased my soul.

She passed away last year, but whenever I look at this selfie, it makes me feel happy and peaceful. This selfie has made the beauty of that moment immortal.

If you want to have a great selfie experience, you should check out the dual selfie camera of Mobiistar. You will be overjoyed to know that it has a fun, dual, selfie camera that will let you click amazing, memorable selfies. The Mobiistar phone can perfectly capture a 120-degree wide-angle shot. Doesn't it sound amazing? 

If you are traveling somewhere, you can capture more of the scenic background without worrying about fitting everyone in. It is a phone designed for the best selfie experience so that you can enjoy more, creating and capturing memories. Check out Mobiistar on Flipkart.