I chose a
life of eternal darkness
Yet the
darkness that I feel today
Is scarier
than the Inferno
The darkness
of mind, heart, and soul
On being near
the corpses of my hundred sons.
My tears feel
like molten fire
Radiating
from my eyes-
Those very
eyes whose vision
I had
sacrificed as a young woman.
They say
Dharma has been established
By the
Pandavas
Under the
guidance of Lord Krishna
But was
righteousness served to me?
I chose a
life of eternal darkness
To stand by
my blind husband, Dhritarashtra
Yet I failed
to protect my sons
From this
devastating catastrophe.
In the
journey of becoming an ideal wife,
I could not become an ideal mother.
My sons
failed to follow the righteous path
Humiliated a
woman in the courtroom
And earned
her wrathful curse
Which brought
their end.
I trusted my
brother, Shakuni
To guide my
sons as his own
Oblivious to
the fact-
Sometimes,
the venom of revenge is
Stronger than
the nectar of love.
They say
Dharma has been established
By the
Pandavas
Under the
guidance of Lord Krishna
But was
righteousness served to me?
I chose a
life of eternal darkness
I couldn't
feel when
The literal
darkness became metaphorical
With the
passage of years;
In my extreme
grief, I- Gandhari
Cursed the
Almighty Lord Krishna
Bringing more
darkness to my heart;
I am now
regarded
As the mother
of the villains
Who have no
right to grieve
Whereas
Draupadi is regarded
As the mother
of the heroes
Who have
every right to grieve
For the death
of her five sons.
But a Mother
is a Mother
Definitions
of hero and villain
Get blurred
in mother's love
My heart has
been shattered
Into a
hundred pieces
Till the mortal body remains,
I will wear
the cloak of grief
And die a hundred
deaths each day.
©Purba Chakraborty
08.04.2020
Note: Gandhari was the princess of Gandhara, wife of the blind king Dhritarashtra and the mother of the Kauravas in the Hindu epic, Mahabharat.
Lovely as usual. I've been reading each of your monologues and each is a gem. At the end of the blog fest, do publish this as a book!
ReplyDeleteOhh, what a resentful poem. I read your poem very slowly, absorbing each word in me. Today I came to know Gandhari's another look here. Lovely, specially loved the ending lines. Too good.
ReplyDeleteHari OM
ReplyDeleteLike a dark garnet, rough and deepest red, you have seen that essence of tragedy that is often a woman's lot; sacrificing for love yet so compromised... wonderful work again my dear! YAM xx
Purba, I look forward to your monologues... Gandhari is right I feel when she said "was righteousness served to me?" She has a tough decision to make husband our sons? this way or that way, she had to loose. I don't think it would have been an easy choice of anyone in place of Gandhari.
ReplyDeleteThis brings out the inner turmoil of Gandhari so well!! Good one, Purba!
ReplyDeleteThough she sacrificed her life for her husband, but it is said that this decision was irrational and it is said that whenever Duryodhana asked Gandhari for blessings, she always said ‘may victory find the side of righteousness’... and it did, but not to her!
Hi Purba..I'd been hearing of your poems but visiting you for the first time. Splendid choice of theme. Unheard voices of women in mythology. Superbly written.
ReplyDeleteJust a doubt...Maybe a typo...Should it be Draupadi or Kunti in the twelfth line from the bottom. Since you approve the comments I thought I'll just ask. Even I'm not sure but just had a doubt.
ReplyDeleteHi Sonia! Thank you for visiting.
DeleteIt is Draupadi. She lost her 5 sons in the Battle of Kurukshetra who were murdered by Ashwathama.
Nicely penned
ReplyDeleteYet another brilliant monologue Purba, you put your emotions and soul in the weave almost stepping into the characters. Another point the choice of characters in impeccable
ReplyDeleteBeautifully penned. You must know The Mahabharatha like the back of your hand. I'm in love with your Mythological poems.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful poem. Gandhari's decision to willfully go blind has always been a point of debate in my head. These lines were my favourite:
ReplyDeleteSometimes, the venom of revenge is
Stronger than the nectar of love.