All her life, she was fed the line “Loneliness can kill a person.” But no one told her, “Loneliness is a state of mind. It’s a choice. What seems to be loneliness for one person can be the blessing of solitude for another person.”
Natasha looked at the beautiful hills, marveling at the beauty of Nature. She was seeking this inner calm all her life, which was amiss since her childhood. Belonging to a rich and orthodox joint family, she always felt chained. An invisible cage followed her like a haunting shadow.
Her happiness did not lie in money, but in simple things that Nature offered. The colorful orchids, the various shades of green, the whiff of petrichor, the play of butterflies, the hide and seek of sun and clouds, the laughter of a child filled her heart with uninhibited joy.
Natasha’s family failed repeatedly to understand her heart. She always had to follow her family’s decision whether she liked or not. She wanted to be a painter, but her family told her there is no money in scribbling lines with a pencil. She was compelled to do B.Com followed by MBA. When she got poor marks, she was admonished and ashamed by her entire family.
Yes, it was true that she never had any shortage of money and material pleasures. But they were meaningless pursuits to her. The biggest wealth for Natasha was freedom and in that respect, she was a pauper. She felt she was an inanimate picture who is shrewdly caged in an expensive golden frame.
Caged birds cannot sing. So, as days rolled on, Natasha became sick and depressed. Her zest for life was fading away like the colors of the sunset. Without painting the glory of Nature on her canvas, she felt her limbs are amputated. When her family saw that her condition was deteriorating, they arranged her marriage with a rich businessman without her consent. This triggered survival instincts in Natasha. She knew that if she blindly followed even this decision of her family, she won’t be able to survive anymore.
She left her house with her savings and paint brushes, determined to fly amid the vast sky. After a few years of struggle, she got a job and settled in a small house in Shillong. She taught English and painting in a primary school, where her students loved her. Her evenings were dedicated to her canvas where she sang the glory of Nature through her paint brushes.
“Don’t you feel lonely living all by yourself in this remote hill station?” The fellow teachers asked Natasha many times to which her reply remained the same.
“I used to live with twenty family members in a huge mansion, but I never had any inner peace. What use it is to have people around you who tell you what to do and what not to do? We are all independent beings. We have no ownership over anyone. Only the Supreme owns us, not any human being. Then, why should I sacrifice my wings and agree to crawl all my life?”
“So, are you truly happy now?” They asked Natasha with a tint of pity.
“Yes. It is long-term happiness because I am under the umbrella of Nature, my Divine Mother Nature. In her bosom, there can only be peace, wisdom, and overflowing love.” Natasha replied with a serene smile.
Alone, but never lonely
She has slowly befriended
Beautiful, arcane, wild things-
Tidal waves on full moon
Gurgling rivers in
Torrential July rain,
Violet and purple wild flowers
Swaying with the whimsical wind.
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