Musings of a Gemini Lass (Sunshine and Wildflowers)

A perennial dreamer I am,

My life is a panorama of myriad hues.

Dancing and fluttering like a butterfly

I leave a tint of cheer wherever I go.

The scars of my metamorphosis

Are camouflaged behind my twinkling eyes,

Autumn and spring coexist in me

I am both vulnerable and resolute;

Inside the social and colorful carapace

You can find a sensitive and poignant soul.

Creativity is my loyal refuge

Where I balance my wavering thoughts,

Arcane twilight or an esoteric paradox?

You wonder every time we meet

Darling! Don't feel uneasy by my duality

See the portrait of life in me

Duality is the beauty of life

Where success and failure are intertwined.

My infectious zest for life 

Will make you admire thorns in roses;

The sanguine dust that I will sprinkle

Will let you find beauty amid chaos. 

Just an earnest pleading:

Never try to cage me in your golden frame;

I will always be your friend and lover

Let's fly together, holding each other forever. 

I always get fascinated with sun signs and their traits. As my zodiac is Gemini, I enjoyed a lot penning down this poem which talks about the common traits of a Gemini girl. 

What is your sun sign? Which trait do you like the most in your zodiac? Do let me know in the comment box. 

'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'

Uncelebrated : Story 4 (microtale) of Sunshine and Wildflowers

Sadly in our country, girls are still treated as a burden by some families. Their education and career are given less preference as those families believe that girls will eventually be married off and have to take care of their family. My grandmother and mother had to face it many years back. 

The sad reality is marriage is still seen as the ultimate destination of a girl's life by some families and society. In all such families, may there be girls like Isha who can convert "being uncelebrated" into "motivation to succeed." May those girls have indomitable power to carve their own path. They are the true alchemists. 

'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'

My friend -the moon (Sunshine and Wildflowers)

A part of me is broken beyond repair

I don't recognize this brokenness

Gazing at me with a grimace

From the other side of the mirror.

I wait for my friend-the moon

Camouflaged by the dark clouds;

I long to unmask my heart today

And sing my sorrow-song to her. 

Living amid the darkness

With a new face each night,

Only the moon can hear me

And be the blotting paper to my pain. 

The moon appeared with a balm for my scars

She said, "Dear girl, life is a perennial journey

From fullness to brokenness to emptiness;

In order to start anew

Embrace thy emptiness

Without getting stuck in 
The desert of brokenness

And one beautiful day, 

You will be shining like the full moon

Opulent, graceful, and resilient." 

This poem is about a girl's friendship with the moon. I believe if we can befriend nature, we can discover a mine of treasure and wisdom within us. At times of despair, gazing at a sunset or moon can provide more solace than talking to someone. 

Although Sunshine and Wildflowers is a blog series of short stories on women, I thought of also using poetry as a tool for story-telling. 

 'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'

After all these years : Story 3 of Sunshine and Wildflowers

It’s been ten years but I made no mistake in recognizing her. There were only five people in the train compartment, out of which she was one. At first, I thought to avoid her. What was the point in exchanging pleasantries after all these years? She had not noticed me as her gaze was transfixed on the screen of her phone. I looked out of the window as I felt the past merge with my present.

No. I cannot run away. I have to face it. If this person can affect me even after all these years, I definitely should not run away.

I picked my bag and moved towards her seat. As I sat in front of her, she hesitatingly turned her gaze from her phone to me. The smile on her face faded away at once.

“Hi Diya! How are you doing?” I asked.

She clearly did not expect to see me all of a sudden. And the fact that I was greeting her as if nothing had happened between us baffled her. After a silence of two minutes, she nodded in reply.

“Just like this train, life moves on. Holding on to anything eludes our peace of mind.” I said looking at Diya who did not utter a single word.

She looked at me, her face tainted with myriad expressions. It was a combination of sadness, guilt, and anger.

“I noticed you for a long time, but couldn’t gather the composure to greet you. After fighting a battle with my demons, I am here sitting in front of you, acknowledging your presence. I can clearly understand what you are feeling.” I continued.

“It’s good to see you, Meera after all these years,” Diya said with a soft smile.

“It’s great to see you too. Hope you are doing well.” I said.

We talked to each other about our present life, family, and work. The cloud of awkwardness did not fade away, but the sun was peeping somewhere behind the clouds. Diya and I were best friends in college. We were inseparable and that’s why people used to call us Siamese twins. As far as I can remember, I couldn’t spend even a single day without talking to her. I considered her my sibling and pleaded with my father to adopt her. We used to argue at times but never harboured any grudges against each other. 

One day, we had a bitter fight full of accusations. In anger, I told her all the things I did for her and she pointed out my faults. The nasty fight was accompanied by several misunderstandings that destroyed the foundation of our friendship. I started avoiding her as even seeing her face pinched my wounds. We went separate ways and never tried to contact each other.

I thought Diya had taken advantage of my helpful nature and exploited me. Maybe, that was true. But in anger, I have also said her things that the present me would have never said. Today, in retrospect, when I think about it, I understand that we both were at fault. And after all these years, it’s meaningless pointing fingers at each other and evaluating who was more wrong. The best thing that we can do to each other now is to release the pent-up anger and get a closure.

“It’s time to leave. My station has almost come. You take care.” I said to Diya.

“Meera, I am sorry for what happened.”

“I am sorry too. And thank you for today. It was great meeting you.” I said and shook hands with Diya. She beamed and waved me a goodbye.

As I alighted from the train, my phone beeped, alerting me of a new Facebook friend request. It was from Diya Sengupta. I felt liberated from the baggage that I was carrying subconsciously for the last ten years. My heart was at peace. It was overflowing with love and gratitude.

  'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'

Nature's Child : Story 2 of Sunshine and Wildflowers

All her life, she was fed the line “Loneliness can kill a person.” But no one told her, “Loneliness is a state of mind. It’s a choice. What seems to be loneliness for one person can be the blessing of solitude for another person.”

Natasha looked at the beautiful hills, marveling at the beauty of Nature. She was seeking this inner calm all her life, which was amiss since her childhood. Belonging to a rich and orthodox joint family, she always felt chained. An invisible cage followed her like a haunting shadow. 

Her happiness did not lie in money, but in simple things that Nature offered. The colorful orchids, the various shades of green, the whiff of petrichor, the play of butterflies, the hide and seek of sun and clouds, the laughter of a child filled her heart with uninhibited joy.

Natasha’s family failed repeatedly to understand her heart. She always had to follow her family’s decision whether she liked or not. She wanted to be a painter, but her family told her there is no money in scribbling lines with a pencil. She was compelled to do B.Com followed by MBA. When she got poor marks, she was admonished and ashamed by her entire family. 

Yes, it was true that she never had any shortage of money and material pleasures. But they were meaningless pursuits to her. The biggest wealth for Natasha was freedom and in that respect, she was a pauper. She felt she was an inanimate picture who is shrewdly caged in an expensive golden frame.

Caged birds cannot sing. So, as days rolled on, Natasha became sick and depressed. Her zest for life was fading away like the colors of the sunset. Without painting the glory of Nature on her canvas, she felt her limbs are amputated. When her family saw that her condition was deteriorating, they arranged her marriage with a rich businessman without her consent. This triggered survival instincts in Natasha. She knew that if she blindly followed even this decision of her family, she won’t be able to survive anymore.

She left her house with her savings and paint brushes, determined to fly amid the vast sky. After a few years of struggle, she got a job and settled in a small house in Shillong. She taught English and painting in a primary school, where her students loved her. Her evenings were dedicated to her canvas where she sang the glory of Nature through her paint brushes.

“Don’t you feel lonely living all by yourself in this remote hill station?” The fellow teachers asked Natasha many times to which her reply remained the same.

“I used to live with twenty family members in a huge mansion, but I never had any inner peace. What use it is to have people around you who tell you what to do and what not to do? We are all independent beings. We have no ownership over anyone. Only the Supreme owns us, not any human being. Then, why should I sacrifice my wings and agree to crawl all my life?”

“So, are you truly happy now?” They asked Natasha with a tint of pity.

“Yes. It is long-term happiness because I am under the umbrella of Nature, my Divine Mother Nature. In her bosom, there can only be peace, wisdom, and overflowing love.” Natasha replied with a serene smile.

Alone, but never lonely

She has slowly befriended

Beautiful, arcane, wild things-

Tidal waves on full moon

Gurgling rivers in

Torrential July rain,

Violet and purple wild flowers

Swaying with the whimsical wind.

 'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'

Choice: Story 1 of Sunshine and Wildflowers

Trisha woke up in the morning with a serene smile. It was the festival of Janmashtami and she could feel the divine presence of Lord Krishna all around her. The flowers in her garden were blooming with all their vibrancy. The soft breeze soothed the unseen blisters of her heart.

The last few months were like a nightmare. She felt that she was walking amidst the hurricane for hours and yet could not reach her destination. The storm was not raging outside but within Trisha’s mind. It was a ferocious battle not only between the brain and the heart but also between her longing and duty. She had spent long nights struggling to find the answer to her questions. Finally, an unseen power planted courage and determination within her which helped her solve the quandary.

She went to her mother’s room and kissed her on her cheeks. This is how she wakes up her mother every single day after her father passed away a few years back. As she prepared breakfast, her phone beeped.

See you in two hours. I am so happy you finally made a decision.

It was a text from Akash. Trisha and Akash have been in a relationship for 5 years. With a content smile, Trisha replied to the message.

See you soon.

After having breakfast, Trisha got ready and embarked on the most important journey of her life. She reached the café in thirty minutes.

“It’s so good to see you smiling, Trisha. I felt that I lost you in the last few months. But now, my girl is back.” Akash greeted her with a smile.

“You know Akash, it is not heartbreaking when the world does not understand us. It is heartbreaking when we don’t understand ourselves. I was feeling lost as I could not hear my inner voice all these days.” Trisha said as she seated herself on the couch.

“You are great at words. I wonder why you haven’t studied philosophy in college. You are so good at it.” Akash smiled and took Trisha’s hand in his. He gently said, “Let’s get married now.”

“I cannot marry you, Akash. Today, I won’t request you to continue our relationship, unlike other days. You are free to leave me and marry anyone. I will always pray for your happiness.”

“Don’t start this again, Trisha. Can you see me with some other girl? Please be honest.”

“Yes, it will be painful, but I can. The thing I cannot see and tolerate is my mother in a help center for Alzheimer’s patients. As long as she is in this world, she will stay with me. I cannot give her responsibility to paid caregivers. I am a part of her. If I cannot be loyal to my own part, how can I be loyal to you, Akash?”

“But what about your own life, Trisha? You are in your late twenties. You will need a life partner someday who can take care of you.”

“The universe will take care of that, Akash. When you proposed me for marriage in front of your family at the beginning of this year, I was overjoyed. But soon, your parents told me that my mother cannot live with us after marriage. I have to send her to a professional help center for Alzheimer’s patients. You supported your parents, saying I cannot spend my life being a caregiver.”

“I didn’t mean it that way, Trisha.”

“You are not wrong, Akash. The responsibility of being a caregiver is huge. I am not ready to marry and start my own family.”

“You are making a terrible mistake, Trisha. You will pine for children and husband one day. You cannot spend your life alone.”

“Every woman has motherly instincts in her. Right now, my mother is my daughter. So I am already mothering her with my unconditional love.”

Trisha’s answer rendered Akash speechless. She got up from the couch and said with a smile, “I will always cherish our memories, Akash.”

After reaching home, Trisha snuggled up to her mother and cried her heart out. Her mother had a blank look on her face. After a few minutes, she gently lifted her hand and caressed Trisha’s hair. After years, Trisha experienced a drizzle of mother’s affection. It flooded her heart with emotions. At that moment, she knew that she made the right decision, under the supervision of Lord Krishna.

 'I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter'